Disclaimer: hard to write, so feel free to read, as I talk….LMAO
OMGosh where to start. Had never had an event so planned that went so hilariously wrong.
Got tix & advanced parking way in advance..got there and found out we had to walk 1.5 miles to the bowl. Okay, fine. We did. Still got there in time. Come out, fighting the crowds, walk back & finally get back to find we were locked out of the lot…grrr. Called the number, & pleaded my case to a recording..lol
Saw a man walking in the lot, called out & basically got ignored as he turned the other way. Perhaps deaf..lol. Left that on my 2nd msg..LOL
Decided we were stuck in LA for the night. Too far for someone to pick us up, and then return ( and fight morning traffic, as well ) by 8 am, so my car also would NOT be towed.
So, hit Google & found Dennys, a mere 2 minutes away, only to find out after not being able to see the sign that that was by car…it was a 12 minute walk, so off we went. Just to find they freakin closed at 12:30. What freakin Denny’s in America closes?? Well, apparently this one does…I told Dolores that I was going in anyway. She just stood there laughing while I went in to ask if we could just sit, & have some coffee, as there were still patrons inside. No. Freaking lady said no. I went back outside and Dolores was just standing there and she was just laughing I’m like okay so now what and she said that there was a McDonald’s down the street and I told her, well the McDonald’s is probably closed too. Anyway she said let’s just go and see so we took off and we went to McDonald’s and as wepassed by, I said ” oh Rite Aid Pharmacy is open 24 hours”and I was like so excited, we could just stand there and read magazines or something…then she started busting up so then we get to McDonald’s and I swear oh my gosh 10 cars decided to go through the drive-thru and she’s just like looking at me in the parking lot going well so I told her I was going to wait and I was going to and “she said pretend you have a car” LOL
I waited and after the last car I walked up to the window and I was telling the lady I said we’re out stranded, we’re walking around, I go that my car got stolen and Dolores is like no no it didn’t get stolen and I said no just got locked up behind a stupid gate and it was I couldn’t get it so anyway so she went ahead and sold me two cups of coffee and I told Dolores that you know we need to find a bench or you know someplace to sit cuz my back was killing me and so you know I just wanted to sit and enjoy my coffee and kind of talk about what we were going to do next so so we found a bus bench right in front of McDonald’s and this guy comes up to us you know we’re just talking in this guy comes up and he’s kind of skinny and not really tall he’s young and he’s carrying a freaking purse and this is La I should have expected that but anyway he came up and he bummed a cigarette and said “hey, I’m gay” it was so funny because I guess he didn’t want to be told you know hey, you know like we were scared or something and you know like a f*** off or whatever I’m going to hit you with my purse and we busted out laughing so anyways so we’re telling him what happened and he’s like all you know getting all emotional and exclamations get out of control you know and stuff and laughing we were laughing and he kind of like entertained us for like an hour you know took our mind off of our situation and you know Dolores and I weren’t scared or nothing cuz we were making enough noise that we were two tough ladies that weren’t going to take any shit from anybody and so nobody was bothering us but there were like peoplesleeping in tents, and doorways…. I really really saw the homeless situation out there and it was quite disturbing you know and and mental illness you saw people talking to themselves and you know I had never seen that before so that was kind of eye-opening for me being born and raised in in LA county you know and not ever having that personally touch me so we were you know just like talking and stuff and he had a friend come up and everything is so he took off and Dolores and I were like what what are we going to do you know we still it was only like 2 and it was we still had to stay there until 8 in the morning or I don’t know at least 5 to figure out what’s going on with the car and and so she’s like talking to her husband on the phone and stuff and we’re all coming to the same conclusion that’s just walk back and see if we can get over the fence and go to sleep in the car you know and then as soon as they open up the gate take off, but first potty time. I told Dolores, lets go back to rite aid…I knew they don’t let the public use the facilities, so I was all prepared…l. We walked in and I plopped my DL on the counter, and said (all in one breath..lol) ” I know you don’t let people use your facilities, but I’m out of town& our car got locked up, and we’ve been walking, and my ex used to work for this company” he handed me the key…lol. I even told him I’d purchase something when we came back. I bought a 3 musketeers bar, for later..lol
So then we walked back to the car, and she’s like Mom I’ll go over the fence first and get the car and bring it really close to the gate and then when you get over you can just get on the car and I’m like okay and it sounded like such a simple plan you know I mean really and then I was like trying to get up on this little brick pillar thing you know that had like the lamp post or whatever and it was like four feet high all right and I’m only 5′ 5″ so it’s like I’m trying to get my leg up there so that I can pull myself up you know and it was just so funny and I got stuck I was laughing so hard and I was like Dolores, I’m stuck and she’s like what and I’m like I’m stuck and she’s like you know just calm down and try and get yourself unstuck and I’m just like, my knee was stuck in between the two things the metal post things on the fence and I was just I was stuck my knee was stuck and I was laughing so hard I probably would have been crying just because I was laughing because I was crying anyway and and she’s just like Mom and I’m like what? I mean like what do you want me to do and so I said, I said well that’s our solution I said we’ll just call the cops and they’ll have to get me out and since it’s the church’s property they’re going to have to wake up somebody in the rectory to come out and help with the stupid fence so they might as well just give me my car and say lady will you just please go home anyway. lol
so I finally got unstuck she’s like Mom just chill.. she goes, I know you’re not permanently stuck she goes I’m not going to call the cops she’s like you know just chill and I’m looking around then and we’re on this dark Street looks like we’re trying to break in somewhere and I said, well somebody’s probably calling them anyway…lol
So anyway I got unstuck and Dolores is like you know bringing the car over and she tells me the bars are parallel on the gate likes step you know so she’s like just walk up the gate and swing your leg over so I walk up the gate and I’m up at the top of the gate and I freeze I freaking freeze and I tell Dolores I can’t do it I just I can’t do it I’m like frozen there and and I’m like are you sure this gate’s strong enough to hold me it’s not going to like fall or whatever you know and she’s like Mom it’s okay it’s a wrought iron you know it’s it’s a steel it’s not going to go anywhere and you know it . she’s kind of getting a little bit exasperated with me but that’s Dolores and and she can see it in my face but it’s not really in my voice but it is so so she gets up there on top of the car and put her open hands on my shoulders and she’s consoling me and telling me you’re not going to fall….I’ve got you…it’s okay I got you, put your leg over the fence and she’s like very stern, mom put your leg over the fence.. so I get it over the fence and she’s like okay now get on the car so I get on top of the car and I’m frozen and she’s like get down I’m like I can’t I need to chill I need to chill all right and so I told her I said get in the car and drive real slow cuz I’m on top of the car and I was holding onto the roof rack you know the luggage rack whatever and she drives really slow and I tell her I say okay now go and park turn around the other way so that we’re facing the gate go on Park and I’ll get down and she’s like okay so she’s driving and she’s like mom she leans out the window and she’s like Mom there’s a lot of like little alcoves in this parking lot she goes you want me to just cruise it, like drive around and see if we can find some place that is a little bit maybe you know in between some houses that doesn’t have a fence or whatever and I’m like yeah sure go ahead so she’s driving through the parking lot and we come around this corner and there’s a freaking gate open and the, and it’s probably been open all night and I told her I said stop the car..I get down off the car and I get in the car and she gets in on the other side and I said I said damn it and she goes I really wanted to walk down that street too but it was like really really dark and I was kind of scared so I didn’t say anything and I was like well hell let’s go we’re going home and we like freaking took off and we were laughing about it when we were Jack in the Box so I can get some coffee before hitting the freeway and she’s like telling Morris on the phone what happened at the end, and we were laughing so hard, and I could hear Morris over the phone. I was laughing and she was laughing and I told him I said we’re on our way home and you know it was just like the most wildest night but it was fun, because I was with my daughter and you know, now we have something that we can laugh and joke about and still remember when we did this and remember when we went to go see Heart and this happened and you know and stuff like that and it’s like we made another connection and that was just really really cool so my next concert is Chicago on Saturday here in my home state ( the state I live in now) and hopefully there won’t be any mishaps cuz I just want to have a nice dinner and come home and go to sleep.
Thanks for kind of reading or as I’m going to put up at the top, viewing it reading it in my voice okay like a conversation like I’m saying it to you in front of you okay because I really tried to write this out and it really came out really funky so I just put on the Google speaker and this is what it is okay?
So thanks alright.
I read this and all the while I thought you had taken a bunch of speed beans, or something similar.
You went to two shows that night. . .
first it was Heart, then it was the show your daughter and yourself put on!
“Take a walk on the wild side!”
So. . .
apart from the Abbot and Costello act, how did Heart perform?
The concert was great. Worth “losing” my car…lol
That whole night was very memorable 🙂
Are you implying I KNOW who those characters are????
Yeah. . .
Thelma & Louise wouldn’t have worked – too extreme baybee!
LOL. Never say never 😉