• sharons anxiety & depression blog posted an update 2 years ago

    Well, I want to apologize or not keeping up with my blog. I have been discouraged, anxious and somewhat depressed. I went out with Jake on a date last Saturday night. We went to the dirt track racing in Chatsworth, GA. He is a good kisser, however, I feel no spark. I stayed at his house, in a separate room. I was not feeling any intimacy. I was very anxious at his house also. While we were at the races, he took his false teeth out to eat. Ugh. Jake has huge pimples all over his face and body. He had a stroke this passed March due to his high blood pressure, which he doesn’t take good care of himself or his home. I felt very uncomfortable there. I left his house at 8a Sunday Morning. I did not wake him, like he asked me to do, before leaving. This pissed him off He said over phone that “that didn’t sit well with him and next tie to wake him up”. We have not talked on phone or through text since that phone call to him. So I have been depressed over that and anxious to get out and look for someone else to talk to online dating sites. Then this morning I see him on Zoosk and I said hello to him. He responded with “good morning beautiful lady” I miss the attention from him. I need to have more empathy than sympathy when it comes to Jake and his looks. While at the racetrack I could see how others viewed him. He talks funny without his teeth, he limps a little too. I felt like they were thinking he was drunk or something, the looks that people gave him, I noticed would be hurtful for me. When he talked to the kids parked next to us, the parents went right over to them, like he was a molester or something. I know his looks are not appealing, but he is a nice guy. Last night I cried a little because I am lonely and depressed. I will try to keep up with my blogs.