LGBTQ

Well this is my first post. I’ve decided to start this because I’m confused and I thought this would be a great place to express my thoughts. Well I’m gay…at least I think I am. I told my friends, step mother, her mother, and my brother. My mother said I have to tell my father. I didn’t tell them I’m confused. I was born a female. I dress kind of androgynous. I used to like this guy who looked like a girl, then started to like a girl who looked like a guy. Now I’m dating a guy and I start wondering if the only reason I can be sexual with this guy is because I wish I had his parts. I feel like that sounds really twisted, but what can I say? Life is twisted. Anyway I do not know how to think of it. I was really hoping someone can help me out with this or something. To be honest I don’t want to come out. I feel like where I’m at right now is best. However, maybe not being safe is better. One time a girl said I was disgusting just because I liked other females. It didn’t really bother be, I just hoped she just felt a different way about it. I had people call me a faggot, but I just tune them out. It’s just hard to listen to my real mother when she says terrible things about gays and trans people. Last year I learned to be okay with me being gay, and I handle my thoughts I had. I’m really just scared if my family starts to hate me because of it. Or just think it’s because of the media or the attention. I don’t even like attention. Plus why would I wanna have people hate me? It’s hard to believe people hate me just because the way I feel.

5 thoughts on “LGBTQ”

  1. I am sorry you have a family like that.
    Unfortunately they may never be ok with it.
    You have to truly dig deep to find out if you are gay or bisexual or whatever. You still seem somewhat confused about it.
    I have 1 gay sister and 1 bisexual sister. It wasn’t always easy for them either.

    I do know they have boards on the internet for LGBTQ where you may get more feedback on the topic.
    I am glad you are here….welcome. And who knows….maybe someone may pop in and be able to offer some advice here.

    1. Yeah I’m pretty confused, but I guess uncertainty isn’t a bad thing. However, thank you for still taking time on reading my post, and giving me your thoughts. I really do appreciate it. I’ve realized that my family is probably not going to be okay with it. But I think it’s much more important in living in the moment. I might not be accepted, but I think it’ll be more sufficient if I just accept that not everyone is accepting. Maybe I shouldn’t find a label for myself. I like knowing; however, I just need to accept that I can’t Know everything. And this might be something I won’t be able to Know.

      1. The most important thing to know…..is yourself.
        And it can take some people years to figure that out.

        As for a label of not knowing…..there actually is a word for it but I can not remember it at the moment.

        Live in the moment….enjoy.

  2. Sweetheart your happiness and well being are primordial so when listening to other’s opinions you must remember, none of us are living your life, we can only support or ignore. You’re in a great place for support and friendship. I have a son who was born female, it was hard to accept my daughter was gone forever, that she was only what we had thought the child was. So life started as a strawberry bonbon but you’re possibly a chocolate and gay to boot. So freaking what?! I’m not sure if I got you right, if not I apologise but if not it’ll get easier. Hey if you need an ear to listen, I’m here. But remember, this life is yours, so try and be happy no matter what. Find that happy in you before you get out of bed and keep your eye on it, it may not be what you have now but keep your eye on it and smile. Life is better than we think, it’s just a question of making it that way. I hope you have a great day!

  3. Honey child!!!! Listen to what I have to say to you. I am a parent of a transgender child, born female transgender to male, even to the point that he changed his name. I always knew my daughter was different when she, even as early as 9 months, did not like hair bows, baby dolls, ruffled socks, all that girly stuff. It wasn’t until he was older that he started to express to me exactly how he felt. Mind you that I was brought up in a very strict religious family, my mom is an Ordained Minister, picture that. But I instilled in my children to be themselves regardless of who likes it or not, even if it’s family and friends. It took some time getting use to it for myself to adapt his change. And yes, he did all the things, before coming out, that I and my family expected as a girl, but wasn’t really happy. He has gone so far to the point of injections to change all female aspects. I decided if this makes my child happy then who am I to disagree, even on a Spiritual basis. I think that the only reason you feel confused about your sexuality is because you’re battling how your family will take it. They can’t accept it until you accept it. In any case be the person that makes you happy, and those that love you will follow suit. I give to you strength to stand strong for yourself!!!!

Leave a Reply