This may have been a flashback article at one time….but recent circumstances remind me. Actually that was the previous time I shared this story. This time, it is because I am going through some old work. I decided to move it to a new site. I will preface the story by saying that my mother once told me that I would argue with a post if it stood still…..and if it found a voice, I CERTAINLY would.
Well, I am at times a very easy going person in that I hate confrontation and hate to have the peace broken. However, if I get my mind made up about something, there is nothing that is likely to shake me from belief in what I am saying. And nobody…and I mean NOBODY is going to dissuade me.
I remember arguing with a neighbor over a glue bottle…I knew how to use it, he either didn’t or pretended not to in order to annoy me, but we argued for a while. Finally, mom told me to stop arguing if this adult was too stupid not to argue with a child. That made him mad and he went home in a snit. My mom wasn’t particularly sorry to see him go, so all was well.
My mother once used a term that I find offensive to discribe me, and gave full push-back. I asked her point blank if she would refer to other people using an insulting word and she acknowledged on each one, that she would not, at least not in person. I, then, asked her why she felt free to refer to me with the insulting word to MY face. She never said that word in reference to me or anybody else after that episode. Well, at least not in my hearing. I can and will stand up for what I believe.
Well, sometimes my resolution and determination (rude folks would call it stubbornness…LOL) come though no matter how gentle or quiet my words are. So it was with this “fight” with my mother.
This was after Roy came into my life. She had been down to see me (read that as us) at our apartment but apparently it had been a while since I had been up to see her. She wanted us, by which she actually meant ME, to come up and spend the weekend with her. She also told me that if we both came we couldn’t sleep together at her house.
Now my reaction to that was to say “ok, when we come there, we will get a motel room”. That is all I remember saying. No rancor, just statement of fact.
About a week or two later, she called back and rescinded her earlier statement and said that she had decided after all that we COULD sleep in the same bed in her house.
Now, why did she change her mind?. Was it because she really decided it was ok? Or was it that she realized that I was just determined enough that 1. I wouldn’t come back “home” unless I had the money for a motel room and 2. if I stayed in a motel room, she would see a lot less of me each trip.
I don’t know, I never asked…I just took the win handled me….went and spent the weekend, the two of us slept in the same room…at her house. And nothing more was said.
Personally, however, I think I “won” because she knew how hard-headed I was and am….and if she stuck to her guns, so would I, and she would see a lot less of me than in the past.