failed again

Well I couldn’t do it chicken hearted that I am. 2 days in a row I tried. Yesterday I got as far as swallowing all my pills for he week as well as a couple from he bottles. Then I went and laid down and promptly passed out. Apparently my wife came home and wanted to go out to eat. I was too passed out to do anything. She couldn’t even wake me. She couldn’t even wake me to say goodby when she left for NC at 4 AM this morning. I was totally out of it and greatky regret it. I missed dinner with her and missed a kiss when she left. Not that I’ve been eating much. Last thing I had was a bratwurst more than 36 hours ago. I just don’t feel hungry. Don’t feel like eating.

Alice I miss you already. I can’t imagine a month without you left alone eternity. But if that is what needs to be done than I am the one to do it. Goodbye honey. I love you more than I can ever put into words. Words just don’t measure up.

I know I’m going to lose you once and for all. I think that will be the time. Or maybe sooner if I can muster the strength to finally free you of me for all time,

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1 thought on “failed again”

  1. Good for us that you did.
    One thing I taught my sons was that Love can come and go once….twice….sometimes 5 or 7 times in a lifetime. Yes it will hurt sometimes….but it will not kill you. Appreciate what you had and move on.

    There are too many wonderful things in this world to experience.

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