Living with Autism Anorexia Recovered Psychedelic /Dyslexia /Dyscalcula

Science Fiction Autobiography of Psychedelic and Injuries proned Mind.

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An Autobiography of a person living with sensory perception weakness and Palsy of motor life skills

Someone that can never live normal life again Miraculous beating of heart If normal people are such vicious I am happy I am abnormal


A Manipulated person with weak mental Mathematical calculation to keep account of his income inflow and outflow

Read More »Science Fiction Autobiography of Psychedelic and Injuries proned Mind.

Cause of Hysteria ( My Story)

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  1. I have been asked a lot of time what hysteria I have from getting married. Today I am disclosing the secret of my hysteria.
    In Past I attempted affairs but I was biased as compared to my brothers. The people I used to fancy used to bias me and fancy any of my brothers. It is reality a perception developed in me that perhaps I am worthless and good for nothing. I can’t support a family it is the only reason women bias me and fancy my brothers.
    When my elder brother used to count those fellows that he perceived liking me. They used to like him and bias me. But he never realized it.
    My heart was broken again and again with such bias. Women bias caused in me attitude of choice rather than compelling a women towards me.
    Once I wrote a story in such a grief where I mentioned sex desire of women as apple of discord and I wanted to eat it up. Don’t be scared. It was just innocence I was mentioning getting hot boobs of a women showing artificial lust actually redirecting it to my siblings.
    Well It was just an innocent thinking that women get hotter just to betray and compel my siblings. Today is the same situation.
    It is quoted as to feed emotional boobs and allow those suckers that measure up to the standards set by these…as I am not a sucker.
    Sometimes I thought as I does nothing that’s the reason of such bias. Reality is I was not entitled properties so that I may survive and women gets security in desiring me. That is still cause of that bias.
    I had excessive quantity of sperms and it is still for sure the reproduction and healthy reproduction was possible from me of generation of my father. It was something that was targeted.
    But believe me lack of wealth and support from emphatic well wishers remained still the bone of contention.
    Today my reputation is of a special dependent human being. But I have a question and many questions…Did I used to be like that as well?
    When I had prospect future why I was immorally biased
    What avenges I faced when even I was 5 years old and even my values were not specified to me what sins The Lord had started recording

Who manipulated my wrong information until obstinately I was destined to a terrific end

Why I was blocked to peacefully fly to a feasible place
What threats they had from me until The Lord made these presumptions a reality

Who bullied my younger brother to take such idiot actions against me

I am still not hundred percent educated from women reproductive cycle such as what menstruation is why women use Pads Why breasts size enlarge and small ..

But Now actually I am fully educated what adolescence is and I am Adult still…..

What condition directed me to imaginations and dream world and why made me daydreamer who shattered my dreams and made them castle of sand
Who abused my hormonal desire and broke my heart into pieces again and again

So much achievements still monetarily struggling can’t been able to cash in any of his achievement that he delivered

Never esteemed for what he actually worth or he is
Why there is difference between actual self and perceived reality

Does a special reproduce same genes….Madness is not genetic You can stone mads but you can’t feel the pain lets feel the pain
Every pondering person is Mad….or they define geniuses a madness as well
Why they feed psychological patients drugs………….doesn’t to impede their brain and noman and nowoman them sexually isn’t this a terrible shame…
They have no mechanism of defining psychological issues in medical language.
Does Technology lack potential of make specials lucrative for society family and country?
If this is due to weak sperms or development in womb disorder  and Because of this multiple special need person are born…The child is it culprit. ?

Why is he deprived of reproduction rights…?
Why such large number of transgender exist in society when actually they are born with a sex.
Are they controlling population by creating a third gender in the society?
Well I hope the world will give better reply of these inquires.

I feared how I will support my family where people perceive he will reproduce same mad children where everyone know sperms brings normal child in world.Madness is not genetic. It’s growth problem and It’s callousness of avenging minds.Obviously The development still takes place such as intellectual development in a nutshell known as Frog of well
I was afraid and concerned about the survival of my children and apathy that my spouse is going to practically face at some point in time I thought I am totally incompetent to live and just suicided when I knew This state will never support my children monetarily till their university Qualification completion take place..

Hence I am rapidly aging almost losing golden days of youth and erection timing sperm quality to reproduce healthy generation

They forced me to job to get married I did jobs  before discriminating me nobody thought how I will survive every body said you are burden for yourself don’t be tornment for others

But God did not let me die I am rapidly aging but not dying.

It is to my great shock that my family clans are avenging me with justifications why they did not gave their daughter to me themselves He is insane He is Mad Mads are not married.

Despite of all past history I was not a transgender to be dealt like transgenders

But this is a reality they piss off mentally ill or sick people

Time is proving they cultured an environment It made growth of circumstances and resulting harsh realities God just slapped back on their faces

The people still in obstinacy with that particular school of thought abuse and curse me after the damage and resulting disaster

These people handicapped me mentally but nobody is standing by my side in rehabilitating recovery I am living on artificial intelligence perhaps this mobile phone gps will be enough for drone strike.

I know well what circumstances my baby sister is facing just because she is their sister my children after me will face more apathy than that my wife may be forced to earn to feed them or instead of getting mad she may spit back everything on them In these 10 years I earned more than 7 lac rupees but I can’t get married I can’t step on my feets while in further 3 years I earned 1 million further but I can’t save it even for a room a complete home is far extent and my reputation is of a madman with damaged memorization that don’t make sound sense

I can’t get departmental protection medically My mental handicapped disability is still hidden in department in fear of getting fired.

Now time is my sister has fancied a love marriage and very soon with in months she is getting married After all an employee is getting married to unemployed day long discussion about property inheritance of The person engaging him and I am facing transgenders like mocking remarks of people curious to know reason of family bias towards me reason of their bias is avenge of my attention seeking horrible email but still I became US soldier A required. All that happened afterwards is Defamation and breakup. That infertile ejaculation uncle and her family clan worshipper terrorist sisters believed in that defaming poison and stinger was My dad’s sister Son and that bastard cousin that is playing pivotal role in defaming me and my siblings ..He is on political forum on tv channels on social media and what poison he defamed about my character about my siblings defaming me as mental psychic and playing pivotal role in break up of my sister. That’s how real sister and brothers are used to be as compared to how I tried to persuade how they should be in joint family system One knot tied together. Not like such cousins that are not just competitors but blood enemies where I have to say I tried a virtue but I failed to love after hearing such injuring remarks once again you are in thirst of love you are not as cheap to care about me Although I am getting old but I have 1 hour long erection timing with dense sperms that is getting wasted in nocturnal penile erections every night although when my brain injury can’t be leaked I have been poisioned with procyclidine and resperidal life long.

Nodoubt I am watching not ending curse results in world Corona is result of negligence and superiority complex of Gods of this earth its mosquito in their noses like pharoah of Abraham period I don’t claim this is a curse from me but it is reality Its God avenging from Gods of this earth but I only onced cursed in 2006 when I was failing in university when they put my survival on stake and raised mental health questions although I was academically performing Later on I had gone psychedelic because of over 10 year psychiatric treatment. And to that extent psychedelic I have stopped making sense earlier I used to make sense I could not survive Jobs that I proved I could have performed normally but people now discriminated my mental condition first intolerated me on work place and as now they say my senses can’t perceive normally they are right Can they compensate that time when they snatched my love from me by almost ending my academic carrier can they compensate that time when i fail even getting prestigious HRM manager opportunities and even Banking jobs When Bank staff tried to No man me by attempting to burn my sperm duct but he miscued although he was dead sure Can there be a parallel law as compared to world laws Real reason behind leaving banking Job is this specially their intolerance regarding me I will never forgive them for ruining my life Can they return my young age period Now compensation is not easy I will get going but you need to compromise damages or kill me let me operate from paradise…An environment is cultured than circumstances grow and every acting force has to payback You can’t call back and further abuse already abused emotionally from mean people and you put conditions for marriage women not only start tempting him but condition of women biasing him is also cultured and the victim starts getting emotionally abused.

When actually I started struggling in perceiving and making sense I started getting abused when being handsome I was aroused sexually and my adulthood has just started due to burn effects erectile muscles started late erecting but when I used to watch erotic item songs These used to make me uncontrolled and I used to have erections but although erection was while nocturnals but once errected blood used to locked in and I used to only rub to orgasm to lose erections by God I weaken it but never pumped it never damaged it that’s why muscles healed back and until now it is fully functional and long but curved…

Really My mom hallucinated white old man spirit that warned her saying she will be mistaken …

It was my mom that educated me and I gave it up foreever and it was in nick of time and wounds healed back and it is science miraculously I only weaken the muscles that healed back and did not damaged it

I was sexually bullied abused and tempted for homosexuality but as I was perceptibly struggling I was madly suiciding but My mind miraculously got rehabilitation Even my stomach got Anorexia because of malnutrition in short I was slow poisoned in a sense and it was believed I will gradually die but This time spirit of my Granny appeared to my Mom and it strictly ordered my mom to take care of me

Later on My mind showed miraculous rehabilitation in an Autistic paralyzed mind and remaining unbelievable wonders are before the world …
Read More »Cause of Hysteria ( My Story)