I was shaped with time.« Back to Questions List
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An innocent kind hearted child, who loved people, spread joy and happiness. A teenager who experienced bullying, isolation, betrayal and depression. A twenty year old with a somewhat balanced and high leveled mind who hates crowded places, loud noices, finds peace in solitude and wears a mask of different personas outside the confort of home and who has a passion for music this is the present me. I tell people I am not kind, their reply is always an expected one,"silence", "don't say that, you're really kind, I know you". Although, some may say that telling this to people is my way of confirming an already know fact or a way to boost my ego. The truth is simple actually, it's neither I am just telling them and my self in a way that I am not a kind person. Why? In order to let go of some of the kindness that resides within me every time I say that. I was shaped into the person I am today through encounters and experiences. I understood with time that I have weakness, a bad side and a sharp tongue. I don't regret becoming who I am today, I accept the fact that I may be unreasonable and crazy sometimes, I may lose control of my emotions and my replies come sometimes uncalculated. Why am I writing this? I don't know I kind of felt like it. Is anyone going to read it or comment on it? Maybe,why not? I just had a fight with my family. I don't hate them nor will I ever do, they are all that I've got. I don't have friends, I have classmates and acquaintances, with whom I pretend to be close with, chat and hang out. They keep on encreasing and changing with time like Lego pieces. I don't mind that though. Is this because I am unable to form deep connections with people? Or mabye because I became uninterested in others? Was it because I was hurt by others, or because I am not qualified enough for deep meaningful relationships? I don't know and I don't think I will ever truly understand the reason behind that. Sometimes, I imagine myself in a different reality, another future, another world even. Do people hold the key to their future, or are they guided by their environment? Could I have kept my innocence and kindness despite the circumstances? Was I shaped because I was weak? Or was this adaptive behavior a sign of growth? |
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there is always a thing to learn form your own experiences may it be bad or good one. most of our behavior comes from our surrounding but at the end its always you who decides what you are and what you wanna be the questions you have does really matters to you ? the best thing we can now do is to make peace with yourself and weak are the ones who are not kind to their-self most of people cant make peace with their own resulting damage to their own self and relations or ending up with ruining others life .yeah our family are always with us but do they deserve to be treated like that have clear idea of yourself try to know what makes you happy being unkind doesn’t help you out from your situation at last stages of our life we don’t wanna anything to regret about we all want a happy life , right? if we get a cut on our finger it hurts starts bleeding but after some days it regains its condition similarly you were hurt may be that makes you angry and feel like of being unkind but at the end you will find your own self coming sining loudly your fav songs dancing and dazzling and if you chose to be like of in bleeding sate you may lose the battle. you don’t wanna accept the defeat right you were a victim when you were not unaware of what’s this why is this ? but this should not make you weak .weak are the ones who have lost theirself somewhere in there life and not dared to find it you are not one of them remember you are always stronger than you think and your strength depends on the way you deal with the challenges and their impact and at last मन के हारे हार है, मन के जीते जीत meaning you lose when you lost yourself and you find you triumph when you are determined with your own self |
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Keep imagining a kind world. We are all evolving into Love. I promise.💋 |
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I love you dear.💋 |
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Emotional abuse by people naturally make us angry. We do wish to lose our kindness in a world of hateful people. This world needs more kindness. Don’t give up on being kind, just associate yourself with the kind oeople we encounter. Stay kind my friend. I’m dying to experience the kindness stored up in your heart.💋 |
